Does life really change when you have kids????

I have heard this term so many times, I felt compelled to write about this, strangely? I have never heard this from a man? Just women.  Why do women have such a different experience than men??? I believe its related to how your life mission is before a child comes into your life, not after they are born.

I believe for some women that phrase, ” Your life changes so much after you have a child”! is really women speak for, ” I can no longer be the center of my universe”!.  You see men are very much programmed to think about being a hunter/gatherer.  We worry about and manage our bills, worry about our families, and those of us in medicine, well our life mission is to care for those less fortunate, the vunerable patient whom have no voice and no advocate. We understand the responsibility of taking care of and being accountable and responsible for someones life, it is never a second thought to put ourselves first, its always humanity first, us second. I believe those women whom are so changed, much like a new pair of high “jimmy Choo’s” its a little uncomfortable to not walk on stable ground.

We have had an explosion of pregnancies with my associates, of course I am so busy I can’t tell, however I did notice one of my associates whom looks like a calorically challenged, Plus sized Lyndsey Vonn had been getting a “beer belly”, but god forbid I ever mention anything, in the new work environment I would never mention anything suggestive of pregnancy or her weight unless I had confirmation of a new born emerging from her at the exact moment. She is quite the party girl and I use to go to her facebook page just to vicariously live through her, ( she knew a post-a -pedic bed based on the guy she had sex with?)  when she told me she was pregnant, and I realized I do not usually think like mainstream, I felt time slow down and fold back on itself.  I remember we were alone and she told me, “I am pregnant!”  I put my hand over my mouth thinking…..,

OHH MY GOD, what are you going to do???…. I mean… I wanted to whisper in her ear…. I know people whom can help you….

Then I thought do you know whom the father is??? Did he leave the country?????

Was this one of those one night situations?, I know the new normal is “once you go black, you never go back?”

But things were so different for me growing up, because it was, Parenthically speaking, “Once you go Black, YOU PARENTS STOP LOVING YOU”!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well,

I know that I had that deer looking into the headlights look, (No disrespect to deers) because she looked at me and said, “We are keeping the baby”.  I guess I am pretty transparent.

Now what happens to these women who’s lives have changed so much…. They are the Helicopter moms that have to give you their opinion on everything. While picking up my daughter, one of these terrorist actually came up to ask me if I needed help putting a pony tail in my daughters hair, “Do you need help with that”? I remember thinking, Oh no you didn’t!!!!!!!!!!,  I told her, “No I don’t need help with this.”!  I don’t let people touch my daughters hair, I don’t know where their hands have been. Well, yes, I got the look,…..

“Light Travels faster than sound, this is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak”

-Author Unknown